Jerk vs Nice Guy… Who wins?
Did you know that something as simple as how available you make yourself – e.g. how easy you are to get in touch with, and how often you’re available to spend time with a woman – can have a huge impact on how attract women find you?
Well, turns out it has a very significant effect, in ways that you might not suspect.
To illustrate my point, let’s set up a little hypothetical fight.
In the red the corner, we have the “Nice Guy”.
He’s always available to hang out with a woman. He will respond to texts and phone calls right away. And he is generally a very caring person.
And in the blue corner, we have the “Jerk”
The jerk is almost never available to hang out with a woman. He takes hours, and sometimes days to reply to text messages, if he even bothers to reply at all. He is mostly just interested in himself.
Now in this hypothetical fight between the “Nice Guy” (always available) and the “Jerk” (rarely available), who do you think wins?
Who do you think women would find more attractive?
Do your thinking now, and once you’re done, read below for my answer.
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If I was forced to pick one, I’d reckon that women would generally the jerk slightly more attractive…
BUT…
The REAL ANSWER is neither.
And I know this because at different points in life, I have been the “Nice Guy” and I have been the “Jerk”.
There was times when I was much younger, I was under the false impression that a lot of men have, that if I were just nice and caring to the girls I was attracted to, they’d appreciate me for it and in turn be attracted to me. However, this strategy just results in having a bunch of female friends who like you… but don’t find you attractive.
These girls like having you around, and like you as a friend. But they just don’t find you “exciting”. You don’t turn them on. And they tend to think that this blindingly obvious, so they come to the conclusion that you must also like them as “just a friend” and couldn’t possibly be attracted to them. It’s a terrible situation to get yourself into.
On the other hand, there have also been times in my life where I’ve been too busy with work, hobbies and other projects, that I’ve blown women off for weeks at a time. Not out of intentional rudeness or anything. I was just busy and had other things on my mind.
And when you blow women off, and become rarely unavailable… a strange thing happens.
At first, it will drive them crazy…
They will see it as a bit of a challenge to get with you…
They will become strongly attracted to you and chase after you…
But if you blow them off for too long – (I’ve found that 2 weeks tends to be most woman’s breaking point) – they will start to resent you, and their attraction to you will be gone.
So what’s the solution?
If being too available, like the stereotypical “nice guy”, never works… and if being too unavailable, like the stereotypical “jerk” stops working after a couple of weeks… the best approach lies somewhere in the middle.
You’ve got to be slightly unavailable.
Sometimes you’ll be available to spend time with her… Sometimes you won’t… Sometimes you might even cancel on meeting with her at the last minute. Most guys are too scared to do this, but in the past, whenever I’ve cancelled a date with a girl, my success rate with sleeping with her on the following date is incredibly high!
Sometimes you’ll answer her phone calls or respond to her texts right away… Sometimes you’ll text her back a few hours later.
This varying of behavior is going to keep her guessing, keep her interested in you, keep her excited by you, and will make you come across as a little bit mysterious.
All of which can strengthen the attraction a woman feels towards you.
Now, what I’ve just shared with you here is very powerful, but it’s only scratching the surface of the way attraction develops inside women’s minds.
I go into way more detail on all of this in the Get Her In Bed program, and once you get the complete picture, you’re going to immediately start having way more success with women.
So if you’re currently struggling with women – or just want to take you game to the next level – quit trying to invent the wheel and start following a program that works.
Here’s the link that’s gonna improve your life:
https://GetHerInBed.com/GetHerInBed
Until tomorrow,
Vince Sutherland